Oliver’s been saying some pretty cute and hilarious things, lately. I’ve started jotting them down because one day, the things that come out of his mouth are going to mostly be annoying and infuriating, so I don’t want to forget the adorable things he said when he was young :).

Oliver: "Oh, it's a crab! Ribbit, ribbit."

Oliver: “Oh, it’s a crab! Ribbit, ribbit.”

A couple of months ago, we were driving in the car and I missed the turn I needed to take. For weeks afterwards, Oliver would constantly say, “Mommy made a boo-boo. Mommy went the wrong way! Had to turn around.” To this day, he still randomly blurts this out on occasion, for no particular reason.

While helping me with the laundry, he pulled one of his blue t-shirts out of the hamper, looked excitedly at the blue shirt he was wearing, and said, “I wearing a blue shirt at the same time!”

He is getting really good at remembering to use his manners, but sometimes it’s completely over the top. Like when he asks, “Mommy help you please, Mommy, please Mommy?”

Last week, after I described to him in detail what I packed in his daycare lunch, he responded enthusiastically, “That sounds like a plan!”

Every time we get stuck in traffic (or if Oliver thinks we are stuck in traffic, say, because we’re stopped at a red light), Oliver says, “It’s a big mess of traffic. It’s kind of annoying.” Sometimes he will also ask, “Mommy cleanup-cleanup the traffic?” I wish I had that ability!

I was carrying him across a busy street last week, and he poked my breast and said, “I touch Mommy’s penis.” Hmm… not exactly :). I have to say I was a little caught off guard by that one and didn’t quite know how to respond. I’m also not sure how a child who was breastfed until 21 months would think breasts and penises are even remotely the same thing!

Whenever we use a public toilet that and I need to wipe the seat off before we use it, Oliver will remark, “Some people are so uncivilized.” Wonder who he got that one from? 😉

Several times a day, Oliver smiles and say, “Oh, I’m so happy.” It is seriously the most heart-meltingly adorable thing — even more so than when he says “I love you, Mommy.”

Oliver loves riding the shuttle bus to the Capilano Suspension Bridge. The buses run through our neighbourhood all day long, and are always noted with an enthusiastic, “Oh, there’s the bus to the wobbly bridge!”

Oliver is going through a phase where he constantly points at cars and says, “Oh, that’s not Mommy’s car.” I’ll usually confirm, “No, that’s not Mommy’s car,” which will then prompt him to say, “Mommy’s car is at home,” or “Mommy has a blue car.” This gets repeated ad nauseum, dozens and dozens of times each day, since it’s impossible to walk through our neighbourhood without passing dozens and dozens of cars. I hope this phase ends soon :).

If Oliver labels something incorrectly and we tell him the correct name for it, he will save face by telling us “It’s a kind of _______ (whatever he called it).” For example, upon seeing an illustration of a blue tit (type of bird), he called it a penguin. When I told him it was a blue tit, he said, “It’s a kind of penguin.”

The other night, J made pork cracklings and Oliver tried them for the first time. When asked if he liked them, he responded, “Pork cracklings is a good idea.”

Oliver loves eating at the yacht club, but I’m worried that he’s becoming slightly obsessed. “I be right back, Daddy. I just go pee-pee at yacht club potty.” Or, “I throw paper towel in yacht club garbage.” And as we head out to the car, “More yacht club please, Mommy?”

He has a funny obsession with diaper changes right now, where every time he lies down on his back, he will say, “I getting a diaper change.” Weird, for a kid who’s been potty trained for more than half a year now.

We have a book that Oliver loves, called Good Night Vancouver. There is one page that reads, “Goodnight Gulf Islands. Goodnight Orcas. Goodnight Pacific Ocean.” It turns out that Oliver doesn’t actually know which is which, because upon seeing a small orca toy yesterday, he picked it up and said, “I want Gulf Islands please, Mommy.”

Finally, the way Oliver talks to the cat using manners, which has to be seen to be appreciated:

What sort of adorable, funny and/or embarrassing things has your child said lately?

10 responses to “OLLIE-ISMS

  1. Priceless! Love those!

    We were driving home late from the grandparents one night and our 3yo said, “I’m so tired. I’m gonna get a thousand sleeps tonight!”

    Also, we had another 3yo last year (we’re foster parents) and I asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. Him: I want to have a tractor! Me: So you want to live on a farm with goats and cows? Him: And horsies! Me: And pigs and chickens? Him: And dinosaurs!

    I think kids are the most hilarious when they are 3yo! The problem is that when they use the wrong words and it’s funny, we start actually using the words!

    We have a 4yo now who says “kilarious” so now we all say kilarious instead of hilarious. Oh and “bathing soup” instead of “bathing suit.” Hopefully i’m not damaging their understanding of the English language. I figure they’ll get it all eventually! 🙂

  2. Socute! My daughter is just starting to really talk now (14 months) and it’s so fun to hear what she repeats and picks up on! I can’t wait for sentences! According to my baby book, one of my first was “puppy don’t eat my blankie!”

  3. I had a friend who was pregnant and her little brother was only 2. He spent the whole pregnancy telling everyone the baby was “in sissy’s boobies”. Guess the boob growth was more noticeable than the belly growth. 😉

  4. At our house, this week, everything is “out dere” (out there)…where is the ball…out dere, where are trees…out dere, where is Jack…out dere…we are trying to leverage this to teach the difference between “out there” and “in here”…am not holding my breath! have started a list too though – using same rationale you mentioned above! Enjoy!

    • Yes, one day we will need to remember the glorious days when every time they opened their mouths, cute stuff came out instead of obnoxious stuff 😉

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